Today things feel turned around though. I think that between some volunteer bonding and getting settled into our placements, I am much more comfortable. Last night, the "newbies" all had initiation. On Tuesday nights, groups from the two volunteer houses go to this place called Brass Bell for karaoke. Our initiation (which no one is actually forced into) was to sing a song of the other volunteers' choosing. Ours, which we only found out as we stood on stage waiting for the music to start, ended up on being "Living on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi. I had low expectations of Brass Bell, but it ended up on being a lot more fun than I had anticipated. Before Brass Bell, I felt like all of the old volunteers kind of already had their groups together, and even though they would help us with questions that we had and such, I didn't necessarily feel overly included. Everyone was kind of mixed in together last night though. In general, I feel much more comfortable here in Muizenberg and without a doubt getting to know and being more included by the others has helped with that.
Working with the kids has been so great! Yesterday was the first official day, and was kind of chaotic just figuring out the dynamics of my classroom. Today though, I feel like I have a good handle on it and can really help some of the kids in my class. I work at the "large" child care center in the township. What is considered small though is a one room preschool, so large doesn't necessarily mean it's that big either. There are probably about eight different classrooms, ranging from children just learning to walk, to age 5. My classroom is for kids ages 4-5, who will be going to school next year. The schools are on holiday right now, so my class is only about half full, but is still absolutely crazy! The class will have roughly 30 kids when everyone returns on the 16th. There are quite a few characters in the class! There are a few particular kids that have really stuck out to me that last two days: Chikondi and Chifondi are the twins, super adorable, but bursting with diva-like attitude; Thatho, Darwin, and Innocence are some of the most hyper, crazy boys in the class, but are really nice boys; Corbin is the craziest boy in class, whose grandmother is the principal and because of that he likes ot do whatever he wants, continually disrupting others; Rachel and Carolion are some of the nicest girsl in the class; and Lauren is one of the sadest little girls I've ever met, who has chosen to adopt me as her friend.
Leslie (another volunteer, here for 3 weeks) and I are in the same classroom. Yesterday, the teacher pointed out the students who we should try to work with becasue they need extra help. Chikondi was one of them, so I had sat at her table with Thatho and Ruth. On the other side of the room, Leslie worked with some of the others. My attention first went to Lauren when she started to cry over thinking she couldn't do something. I actually met Lauren for myself this morning, when "Teacha" asked that I work one on one with her. We were working on Writing numbers and her name. The students don't progress to the next level of work until they are able to look at a big list of names and identify their own, to spell out their whole name, to write out their numbers, and to be able to point to and say which number is which. Right now, Lauren really isn't able to do any of that. We started out writing numbers together, me holding her crayon with her and helping to guide her hand. Eventually, I just pretended to guide her hand, but as I suspected, she was able to do most of the numbers without my control over the crayon-- with as much accuracy as I would expect from any 5 year old. Gradually I worked her into doing the numbers by herself. Teacha was so, so happy with her. I later overheard her telling another teacher about Lauren's progress and how she had been considering moving her back down to be with younger kids before today. The assistant teacher with us had come up to me early on in the morning to warn me that, "This one's lazy. She's just going to sit there and cry, she won't end up doing much of anything for you." With all of the kids, the teachers are extremely blunt and negative about the kids right in front of them. I like my head Teacha, I think that her approach can still be somewhat blunt and harsh at times, simply because that is the customary practice here, but she is much less drastic about it.
I worked with Lauren for about an hour, creating different ways of learning to write the letters or numbers and eventually combining them. Lauren was extremely quiet at first. She really is just a sad, sad looking little girl. By the end of our workbook time though, she seemed incredibly more comfortable. I honestly think that she comes from an horribly harsh home life. All of the kids in my school live in huge poverty and many of them do not have much of any type of home life, but the devastation in Lauren's life is so clearly much worse than the others in my class. She would be doing so great, and I would really make sure to lay on the praise extra thick, but she still would think that she was doing horrible and start hitting herself over and over again. I'd have to stop her each time and try to tell her as best I could that she doesn't deserve that and remind her how well she was doing. By the end of workbook time she had stopped doing it as much as in the beginning, but it was still just so sad . . . After workbook time, we have a fruit break and story time-- they love Dr. Seuss, and after that we go outside to the playground. Again, Lauren seems just so much more affected by whatever it is that has gone on in her life. She is incredibly anti-social, or maybe has extremely dramatic social anxiety, but whatever it is, she wants nothing to do with any of the other kids. The large majority of kids run around with each other and try to have as much fun as possible. There are the few exceptions to this though, like Lauren, who just wants to stand and hold your hand or be held. What makes the situation even more difficult is when you have twenty kids all fighting for your attention, but the one you know especially needs you attention gets very uncomfortable with all of the commotion. Even taking Lauren out of the equation, it is so hard to divide yourself evenly amongst the kids-- everyone wants to be the one who is holding your hand, or closest to you, or who has your full attention. From the older volunteers, I have heard about how the "longer term people"-- a month of more-- generally try to focus in on a few specific kids who really need the help. Lauren is without a doubt one of my kids that I will be doing as much as possible for. I think that what she needs most is love, positive attention, some sort of social integration, and encouragement that she is actually worth something. In five and half weeks I would be completely unrealistic to dream of helping her with all of this, but hopefully I can help to get her started in a better direction.
Corbin is another one that I would really like to help guide while I am here. He is without a doubt the most naughty kid in the class. With his grandmother as principal of the school he likes to do whatever he wants and knows that he can get away with a lot more. Our poor Teacha can't just send him to the principal's office for acting up and is really stuck putting up with much more than is appropriate. I haven't got him quite figured out, but right now I think that it is all about getting attention. Once I've figured him out a little bit better, I really want to do something to help him see that he doesn't have to act the way he does. Again, I realize how ambitious this is though . . .
Today especially was very rewarding. I feel like I've gotten to know the kids so much better. I am also really excited to be doing something structured with them, instead of just playing with them. After working with Chikondi yesterday, and especially Lauren today, I have SO much more respect for child educators. I didn't by any means disrespect them in any capacity before this experience, but it takes a lot of energy to communicate effectively while being incredibly patient and reassuring for what are sometimes long periods of time. The kids in my class can be absolutely wild! Putting up with it, however chaotic it may be, has been nothing but great so far! To all of the kids, I am Teacha A-lee!
So I am definitely feeling much better about being here, now that I am over the huge culture shock of how scary of an area it is. It isn't too bad, as long as you aren't carrying any valuables or have them stuffed away somewhere other than a bag that would likely be snatched if mugged . . . I'm happy with my placement, which is definitely the most important thing to making this an important experience.
Also, special thanks to the lovely Katherine Moore for sneaking a note into my suitcase for me to find when I arrived to South Africa! I have been online a few times since arriving, but with all of the other craziness, have forgotten to mention how much I loved finding it!
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